The more things that are happening in my life, the more reluctant I am to write about them. There's so much potential in the air right now! While I would in no way wish to trivialize the painful circumstances so many have faced during the current recession, our reality has been a season of growth and opportunity. Patience, economizing, and hard work are always a good policy. They are persistently successful, in good times and bad.
It's been so hard to learn to be patient financially. When you leave home, you think you'll be enjoying the lifestyle you were accustomed to in your parents' house in no time at all. But how old were they when they reached that point of fiscal comfort? How many years did they rely on the help of others? Did you watch them lose everything again? Do you know anyone who bought a home without any help from family, through cosigning, loans, or inheritance? Do you remember years that you lived without insurance? Times when groceries showed up on the front porch and your mother breathed a prayer of thanks?
My children will not remember the earliest hardships. The youngest will have only vague memories of living in a rented house. They have no idea how much help we received from family. They know only full bellies and warm beds, iPads and bicycles, bowling leagues and music lessons, throwing out clothes because they don't like them anymore with no concern for where more will come from.
I wonder how they will adjust when they leave home. I often consider what the best ways to help them will be. Then I remember how silly it is to worry. Some of the best years of our lives have been the ones in which we struggled. The adventures we've had and the people we've become have been shaped by the hard years. They allow us to appreciate this season of potential in a deeper way. They allow us to live in contentment, even as we press on toward the big dreams. The ones we couldn't see a way to in the beginning, but dreamed nonetheless.
How good life is!
Thursday, July 28, 2011
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Things That Happen When Mom Gets Sick
48 loads of laundry pile up (no exaggeration) and the laudromat takes their $100 in exchange for digging you out.
The Yard Sale she had all set up and advertised on Craigslist becomes self-service on the honor system and the stuff sits out on the front lawn for more than a week. Interestingly, more money was made than during a dutifully supervised Saturday event.
The kids re-watch all three seasons of the animated series "Avatar: The Last Airbender" which she had previously deleted from the Netflix Queue when she discovered they could quote the entire series verbatim and the four year old started running around with big arrows drawn all over her head and down her arms and asking if she could shave her head.
Clean dishes get put away in all kinds of interesting places and dirty dishes pile up until there's no counter space left. Dad moves to cooking on the camp stove outdoors rather than attempt to dig out the kitchen.
Children subsist on cereal, peanut better and jelly sandwiches, sliced salami, tangerines, fruit snacks, and frozen Gogurts. A month's supply of Popsicles disappears and they all forget how to count to one, as in one (1) soda per day max. (It is summer after all.)
Baths are forgotten and the children eventually begin to compare the trails of earwax oozing out of their ears.
Her blog gets abandoned for a while and when she comes back to it, she's still so off kilter she just posts a little ditty she wrote a while ago and hopes her readers enjoy it.
It's good to finally be well!
The Yard Sale she had all set up and advertised on Craigslist becomes self-service on the honor system and the stuff sits out on the front lawn for more than a week. Interestingly, more money was made than during a dutifully supervised Saturday event.
The kids re-watch all three seasons of the animated series "Avatar: The Last Airbender" which she had previously deleted from the Netflix Queue when she discovered they could quote the entire series verbatim and the four year old started running around with big arrows drawn all over her head and down her arms and asking if she could shave her head.
Clean dishes get put away in all kinds of interesting places and dirty dishes pile up until there's no counter space left. Dad moves to cooking on the camp stove outdoors rather than attempt to dig out the kitchen.
Children subsist on cereal, peanut better and jelly sandwiches, sliced salami, tangerines, fruit snacks, and frozen Gogurts. A month's supply of Popsicles disappears and they all forget how to count to one, as in one (1) soda per day max. (It is summer after all.)
Baths are forgotten and the children eventually begin to compare the trails of earwax oozing out of their ears.
Her blog gets abandoned for a while and when she comes back to it, she's still so off kilter she just posts a little ditty she wrote a while ago and hopes her readers enjoy it.
It's good to finally be well!
Sunday, July 17, 2011
All's Fair
The days leading up to the drop off deadline for Fair entries are always chaotic. One child hasn't finished their entry, and won't. Another is getting hers done, but not doing them well. The youngest isn't old enough to enter her projects so she's getting into all the supplies trying to put together something that will make me change my mind, as if I had the power to do so. The last has painted a beautiful acrylic but doesn't want to enter that one, she wants to enter the big ugly one she just did. Yes, it really is ugly. Mother's aren't blind.
In a few weeks we'll pick up our adopted Grandma Joanie, and maybe Grandma Karen too, and all go to the opening day of the Fair to see how our entires did. The tickets are free because we took the time to enter our crafts. Then we'll wander through the flower show, animal pavilions, kids game and craft areas, petting zoo, etc. We'll go for a hayride pulled by draft horses. The ice cream will be provided courtesy of Clover Stornetta. We'll watch cows being milked as we eat it. Dinner will be complete junk and we'll all go home tired and happy.
About a week later we'll meet back at the fair with my sister in law and the majority of our cousins for ride day. Everyone will wear matching shirts that are NOT blue or red. Yes, they almost didn't let us in one year because of our shirts, in case we were some kind of weird toddler gang. We'll get our unlimited ride wristbands, split the group by who's tall enough for the big kid rides, and see how many we can go on without puking. At some point we'll break for potty and more free ice cream. We'll catch a magic act, or water dogs. Maybe we'll catch a contest, like the year we competed for the most gawdawful scream, or Harry Potter Trivia Master! At the end of a long day, we'll meet up with Daddy for dinner and dancing by the bandstand.
Year after year, memory after memory, we build up our family history and traditions. We change what didn't work, and try some things new. Our experiences are the same, but completely varied. Our approaches to life are as different as our approaches to crafting our exhibit entries.
One lags behind, but sees things others don't. One tries to do everything and gets a wide variety of experiences, but doesn't waste time going really deep into any of them. One sees the same things in the opposite way as everyone else and discerns beauty where we see only ugly. One works harder than all the others because she's certain she's not too little, and she squeezes more life out of life than anyone I know. Because we are together, we get to share each others insights. We get to experience the world more fully, because we can talk about our various perspectives.
This is why one child was not enough for me. Why I'm so glad I kept going until my house and heart were full. I'm not saying four is the perfect number. I'm just saying children are a blessing. Don't let fear limit your family. And going to the Fair is LOTS more fun with kids than it was as a teenager or childless adult.
In a few weeks we'll pick up our adopted Grandma Joanie, and maybe Grandma Karen too, and all go to the opening day of the Fair to see how our entires did. The tickets are free because we took the time to enter our crafts. Then we'll wander through the flower show, animal pavilions, kids game and craft areas, petting zoo, etc. We'll go for a hayride pulled by draft horses. The ice cream will be provided courtesy of Clover Stornetta. We'll watch cows being milked as we eat it. Dinner will be complete junk and we'll all go home tired and happy.
About a week later we'll meet back at the fair with my sister in law and the majority of our cousins for ride day. Everyone will wear matching shirts that are NOT blue or red. Yes, they almost didn't let us in one year because of our shirts, in case we were some kind of weird toddler gang. We'll get our unlimited ride wristbands, split the group by who's tall enough for the big kid rides, and see how many we can go on without puking. At some point we'll break for potty and more free ice cream. We'll catch a magic act, or water dogs. Maybe we'll catch a contest, like the year we competed for the most gawdawful scream, or Harry Potter Trivia Master! At the end of a long day, we'll meet up with Daddy for dinner and dancing by the bandstand.
Year after year, memory after memory, we build up our family history and traditions. We change what didn't work, and try some things new. Our experiences are the same, but completely varied. Our approaches to life are as different as our approaches to crafting our exhibit entries.
One lags behind, but sees things others don't. One tries to do everything and gets a wide variety of experiences, but doesn't waste time going really deep into any of them. One sees the same things in the opposite way as everyone else and discerns beauty where we see only ugly. One works harder than all the others because she's certain she's not too little, and she squeezes more life out of life than anyone I know. Because we are together, we get to share each others insights. We get to experience the world more fully, because we can talk about our various perspectives.
This is why one child was not enough for me. Why I'm so glad I kept going until my house and heart were full. I'm not saying four is the perfect number. I'm just saying children are a blessing. Don't let fear limit your family. And going to the Fair is LOTS more fun with kids than it was as a teenager or childless adult.
Friday, July 15, 2011
The Boy Who Lived
If you noticed the big gap in postings, I apologize. This topic took more than the usual consideration, because I want to communicate clearly. I grew up in a tightly controlled church environment, but my parents taught all of their children how to think, rather than the usual what to think.
When the Harry Potter books first started making headlines and the the Christian media immediately condemned them, I knew they warranted closer examination. I have heard all manner of arguments for and against the series. Everyone is convinced they know for certain some detail about the author, or whatever, that proves the books are evil.
In the beginning I wasn't interested in reading them. They're children's books! I couldn't get past the first chapter of the first Narnia book, which I consider to be a similar genre. They couldn't possibly be interesting to me.
I have children, and I have to consider them. They are going to grow up in a culture where everything about this series is common knowledge. The myriad ways in which it has impacted our popular culture are almost without precedent. If I tell them not to read the books, what can I suppose they'll do the moment they're out of my control? Can I really trust a televangelist who spouts fear from the pulpit? I know that fear is not from God, so messages that bring fear are NOT from God. So I decided to be responsible and try to read the books myself.
Amazingly, I was absorbed in them almost immediately. Since I do have a keen academic interest in fairy tales and mythologies, I found the clever mixing from so many sources humorous and imaginative. Nothing in the series resembled modern witchcraft, Wicca, occult or satanism practices or beliefs. Most astonishingly, I immediately recognized the biblical parallels. I told my husband when we finished the first book that Harry would have to die at the end and come back, because he was a type of Christ. The last three books weren't even out yet. I also told him Ron only has a little sister because Harry needs a way to become part of this family for real someday, and that Ron would probably end up with Hermione because Harry and Hermione would be too obvious. Marrying my big brother's best friend probably gave me a little insight into how that goes. The last book was a pleasure to read, but not a surprise.
In the meantime, we decided to let our kids watch the movies and read the books with us. That way we could discuss any questions that arose and explain anything they didn't understand. I felt it far wiser to expose them while still in the safety of our home, than force them to wait until they're gone, making them uncomfortable discussing the subject with us. It's always the things that are completely banned that kids get into the first opportunity away from home.
We've enjoyed playing at being fans. While not seriously absorbed ourselves, it's still fun to hang out with the crazies who are. Thursday night, I took my second daughter to see a double feature of the last two movies, The Deathly Hallows part one and two. It's been something fun we have in common with our kids. It's been a challenging read but she persists. It's opened up doors of communication about relationships, good and evil, love and sacrifice. All things I'm happy to help her process.
It would be ridiculous for me to say everyone should take my opinion on the matter and do likewise. Every family is different and some really have no interest at all. But I hope you will consider the process we went through in determining for ourselves what was appropriate for our children. Be especially careful about what you blindly ban from your house. If you have good reasons you can intelligently discuss with your kids, you might get away with it. If you don't, you're setting them up for rebellion, which just happens to be the sin equivalent of witchcraft.
When the Harry Potter books first started making headlines and the the Christian media immediately condemned them, I knew they warranted closer examination. I have heard all manner of arguments for and against the series. Everyone is convinced they know for certain some detail about the author, or whatever, that proves the books are evil.
In the beginning I wasn't interested in reading them. They're children's books! I couldn't get past the first chapter of the first Narnia book, which I consider to be a similar genre. They couldn't possibly be interesting to me.
I have children, and I have to consider them. They are going to grow up in a culture where everything about this series is common knowledge. The myriad ways in which it has impacted our popular culture are almost without precedent. If I tell them not to read the books, what can I suppose they'll do the moment they're out of my control? Can I really trust a televangelist who spouts fear from the pulpit? I know that fear is not from God, so messages that bring fear are NOT from God. So I decided to be responsible and try to read the books myself.
Amazingly, I was absorbed in them almost immediately. Since I do have a keen academic interest in fairy tales and mythologies, I found the clever mixing from so many sources humorous and imaginative. Nothing in the series resembled modern witchcraft, Wicca, occult or satanism practices or beliefs. Most astonishingly, I immediately recognized the biblical parallels. I told my husband when we finished the first book that Harry would have to die at the end and come back, because he was a type of Christ. The last three books weren't even out yet. I also told him Ron only has a little sister because Harry needs a way to become part of this family for real someday, and that Ron would probably end up with Hermione because Harry and Hermione would be too obvious. Marrying my big brother's best friend probably gave me a little insight into how that goes. The last book was a pleasure to read, but not a surprise.
In the meantime, we decided to let our kids watch the movies and read the books with us. That way we could discuss any questions that arose and explain anything they didn't understand. I felt it far wiser to expose them while still in the safety of our home, than force them to wait until they're gone, making them uncomfortable discussing the subject with us. It's always the things that are completely banned that kids get into the first opportunity away from home.
We've enjoyed playing at being fans. While not seriously absorbed ourselves, it's still fun to hang out with the crazies who are. Thursday night, I took my second daughter to see a double feature of the last two movies, The Deathly Hallows part one and two. It's been something fun we have in common with our kids. It's been a challenging read but she persists. It's opened up doors of communication about relationships, good and evil, love and sacrifice. All things I'm happy to help her process.
It would be ridiculous for me to say everyone should take my opinion on the matter and do likewise. Every family is different and some really have no interest at all. But I hope you will consider the process we went through in determining for ourselves what was appropriate for our children. Be especially careful about what you blindly ban from your house. If you have good reasons you can intelligently discuss with your kids, you might get away with it. If you don't, you're setting them up for rebellion, which just happens to be the sin equivalent of witchcraft.
Monday, July 4, 2011
Fireworks Permits
It's the Fourth of July and I woke to the sound of illegal fireworks exploding in the park behind my house. All fireworks are illegal in my city, but these were the kind that were illegal even before the complete ban was instituted. It was indescribably stupid for the city to institute the ban. People who would otherwise have been happy with "safe and sane" fireworks decided to protest by buying the more dangerous kind. The sirens are whirring all day and the snap crackle pop is more than the full police force can pretend to subdue.
It's my assertion that a permit system needs to be put in place, wherein intelligent, responsible citizens can take a video course at the local fire station, demonstrate their compliance with the laws, and obtain a t-shirt printed with a one day permit for safe and sane fireworks in a designated location. The t-shirt would make them easily identifiable as the responsible person at the neighborhood block party, and would essentially deputize them all over the city to photograph, report, and even make citizen arrests for the use of more dangerous explosives. They would have to remain sober as a condition of their permit and be taught proper procedure for citizen arrests as part of their video course.
The law as it is unfairly punishes responsible citizens and encourages them to sympathize with the irresponsible ones. The ones who will not be stopped by any laws.
I would also encourage them to make holidays like the Fourth of July their designated everyone rides the bus for free days, with hours extended until midnight, or two am on New Years. The point of a free ride day is to get people to try the bus, and more people are likely to do so on a day when they know the roads will be crowded and/or they expect to be drinking. Ending the public transportation day at 8:00 makes it completely impractical to use on holidays. Days when it would otherwise be a great option.
Now, to dig up the emails of our local city council and send this to someone who can do something about it. I miss my fireworks dang it!
It's my assertion that a permit system needs to be put in place, wherein intelligent, responsible citizens can take a video course at the local fire station, demonstrate their compliance with the laws, and obtain a t-shirt printed with a one day permit for safe and sane fireworks in a designated location. The t-shirt would make them easily identifiable as the responsible person at the neighborhood block party, and would essentially deputize them all over the city to photograph, report, and even make citizen arrests for the use of more dangerous explosives. They would have to remain sober as a condition of their permit and be taught proper procedure for citizen arrests as part of their video course.
The law as it is unfairly punishes responsible citizens and encourages them to sympathize with the irresponsible ones. The ones who will not be stopped by any laws.
I would also encourage them to make holidays like the Fourth of July their designated everyone rides the bus for free days, with hours extended until midnight, or two am on New Years. The point of a free ride day is to get people to try the bus, and more people are likely to do so on a day when they know the roads will be crowded and/or they expect to be drinking. Ending the public transportation day at 8:00 makes it completely impractical to use on holidays. Days when it would otherwise be a great option.
Now, to dig up the emails of our local city council and send this to someone who can do something about it. I miss my fireworks dang it!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)